‘Pay close attention to what my eyes are saying without having to spell it out’: Heterosexual relations and discourses of sexual communication in #MeToo commentaries

Abstract

This paper explores how concepts of sexual communication and sex are discussed in #MeToo commentaries. Previous research has focused primarily on questions of consent, gendered power relations and sexual violence against women. Drawing from work that has called for more reflexive considerations of desire and pleasure in #MeToo, I undertake a critical feminist discourse analysis of over 163 traditional news, online magazine and social news articles commenting on #MeToo, sexual communication, dating and heterosexual relations between men and women. The findings of this analysis note discourses underpinning tensions between what constitutes ideal or appropriate forms of sexual communication, uncertainties as to what effectively makes sex ‘good’ or ‘bad’, moralisations regarding how ‘good’ and ‘bad’ sex are possible, and contradicting accounts of women’s capacity for sexual empowerment. Through highlighting the incongruities in expectations as to how individuals should proceed sexually and romantically in a #MeToo era, I conclude with a discussion on how we can think about such relations within a consideration of a ‘self-in-process’ and ‘subject-act-ivity’ framework.