Mothers Now Childless: Survival after the Death of an Only Child

Abstract

Prior research has highlighted the search for meaning and its impact on personal growth following the death of a child [1–3]. This study, however, is the first to address the dual loss of a child and of the role of parent. Qualitative and quantitative approaches were used to understand the life-world of eighty mothers whose only child (aged 3 to 21) died from accident or illness five or more years previously. The data produced descriptions of the qualitative difference between remaining in a state of perpetual bereavement and surviving to live life “alive” again. The findings suggest that motherhood becomes an integral part of the self and in order to survive this dual loss, it is necessary not to relinquish this construct. Rather, it is important to find meaningful ways to continue “mothering” as part of a new, more integrated identity which acknowledges the child's death but also preserves the child's memory and honors the woman's past life as a mother.