“It's Hard to Feel Like Someone's Sibling When You Were Their Pseudo-Parent”: A Grounded Theory on Adult Sibling Relationships After Parentification

Abstract

Assuming parental responsibilities during childhood, typically out of need due to complex life circumstances, is often referred to as parentification in family studies. Although this phenomenon serves a function for families as they navigate unexpected or difficult situations, relationships amongst family members can become convoluted, especially between siblings. Using constructivist grounded theory, we developed a theory of how parentified individuals navigate relationships with their siblings once in adulthood. Findings indicate that the theme of choice versus circumstance plays a vital role in parentified siblings remaining parentified or choosing to create new relationships with their siblings. Additionally, distance, whether physical or emotional, allowed parentified siblings to navigate their sibling relationships after stepping out of the parentified role in the family. Six relationship types are presented for individuals who chose to create new sibling relationships after parentification, which were driven by two leading emotions: resentment and remorse. Clinical implications are discussed for therapists helping clients navigate restructuring sibling relationships in adulthood.