Why Me? Parental Reactions to the Birth of an Exceptional Child

Abstract

Parental reactions to the birth of an exceptional child are examined in the context of two conceptual frameworks: the traditional psychoanalytically oriented approach, which emphasizes the maladaptive aspects in parenting an exceptional child, and the developmental approach, which emphasizes the opportunities for growth and successful adaptation in parenting an exceptional child. Parents examined according to psychoanalytic constructs are often placed in the role of psychiatric patient. Guilt receives a major emphasis as a near universal characteristic; consequently parental reactions are seen typically as demonstrating nonacceptance or rejection of the exceptional child. Professionals subscribing to psychoanalytic theory may assume an accusatory attitude toward parents by holding them culpable for their child's condition. In contrast, parents examined according to the developmental framework are believed to change dynamically in response to the multiple demands of their child and their own roles in the greater society. Thus parents are thought to be able to assume viable roles as agents for change. A joint supportive parenthood of parents and professionals may be more likely given a developmental orientation when parental reactions to the birth of an exceptional child are valued as predictable, natural, and appropriate.