Aroha and Manaakitanga —That’s What It Is About: Indigenous Women,“Love,” and Interpersonal Violence

Abstract

Māori women (Aotearoa New Zealand’s Indigenous women) experience a high burden of harm and homicide associated with intergenerational family violence, complicated by the ongoing effects of colonialism. Also, the historical, social, and cultural complexities, such as poverty and structural racism, challenge further Māori women seeking help. In this project, we sought to answer two questions: What are Māori women’s sociocultural constructions of “love” within relationships with violent partners? What roles do traditional cultural values play in their relationships? Using Kaupapa Māori (by Māori, for Māori) methodology, we conducted in-depth semi-structured interviews with 27 Māori women and analyzed them using thematic analysis. We identified three core themes that explain how Māori women enter into, stay in, and leave a relationship with a violent partner: (a) it begins with a connection, (b) downplaying the signs, and (c) needing to leave. We found that Māori women’s compassion and caring for their partner was underpinned by their recognition that partners had the potential to be nonviolent and resembled Māori cultural concepts of aroha (compassion, empathy, and respect) and manaakitanga (hospitality, sharing, and caring for others). Through sharing their stories, these women revealed the strength of cultural imperatives that include the importance of whakapapa (genealogy) and whanaungatanga (connections) of which aroha and manaakitanga are integral parts. Our findings highlight the complexity and competing tensions underpinning Māori women’s decision-making when entering and exiting violent relationships. These cultural imperatives are essential for understanding how these influence the decision-making of Māori women, which can position them at odds with those who would tell them they must walk away and not look back.