The present research examines two early steps in friendship initiation: (1) Perceiving potential friends’ interest, and (2) responding to that interest. We also consider how attachment insecurity might create challenges with these steps. In Study 1, two unacquainted participants briefly interacted, then reported their own interest in friendship and their perceptions of the other person’s interest in friendship. People generally underestimated others’ interest, yet they also projected their own interest onto others and reciprocated others’ interest. Avoidantly-attached individuals were especially likely to underestimate others’ interest. They were also less interested in others, regardless of others’ interest; this link was mediated by lower perceptions of others’ interest. Anxiously-attached individuals’ interest was not associated with others’ interest. In Study 2, participants interacted with a potential friend (a confederate) who expressed experimentally-manipulated interest or disinterest in friendship. Avoidantly-attached individuals felt more hostility in response to disinterest than did others; anxiously-attached individuals felt more fear in response to interest than did others. We discuss how attachment insecurity might impede friendship initiation at its earliest stages.
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