Traditional and Nontraditional Men's Responses to Women's Dating Initiation

Abstract

One important aspect of social skills training is knowing what skills to teach. What should therapists advise women who could benefit from dating more? This study assessed traditional and nontraditional men's responses to several approaches women could take to initiate dates. Participants were 100 men from Texas A&M University and 107 from the University of Wisconsin-Madison. Traditionality was measured using the Attitudes Toward Women Scale (Spence & Helmreich, 1972). Men were asked how they would respond if a woman whom they wanted to date, liked as a person but had not thought of dating, felt indifferent toward, or disliked took six dating-initiation approaches: asking him to a party, lunch, or a concert; hinting by mentioning a movie or mentioning she had no plans; or merely waiting. The relative effectiveness of these different approaches was calculated. Results showed that traditionality did not affect responses to these approaches, and campus played only a minor role. On the other hand, how much the man liked the woman greatly influenced his responses. If he wanted to date her, asking or hinting would be effective; if he liked her as a person or felt indifferent toward her, asking would be more effective than hinting; if he disliked her, no approach would be effective. Men reported that they were unlikely to ask out a woman who merely waited, regardless of how much they liked her. Implications for therapists helping women with dating-initiation skills are discussed.