“In Case Something Happens to Me”: The Emotional Mandate and Wills of Joy in Soldiers’ Letters

Abstract

This phenomenological study examined 60 final letters and messages from soldiers who fell in the “Iron Swords” War, identifying the emergence of an “Emotional Mandate” that actively manages parental bereavement. The findings reveal that in these letters, soldiers requested their parents to rejoice and celebrate life rather than mourning traditionally, thereby expropriating their autonomy over their grief. The analysis highlights a “Dyadic Effect” that constructs gendered resilience roles between the father and mother, and an “Archaeology of the Letter” that imbues both the digital and physical medium with binding authority. The study warns against “Grief under a Mandate for Positivity,” which fosters disenfranchised grief and increases the risk of Prolonged Grief Disorder (PGD). Finally, it emphasizes the therapeutic necessity of legitimizing the pain that contradicts the soldier’s request for joy.