Balancing Face-to-Face and Digital Communication: The Role of Relationship Maintenance in Dual-Earning Families

Abstract

This study examines how face-to-face (FtF) and computer-mediated communication (CMC) contribute to relationship maintenance and resilience in dual-earning families, a largely overlooked area in family communication research. Guided by the theory of resilience and relational load (TRRL), we test how ongoing FtF and CMC maintenance behaviors predicted well-being across a week among 62 families (i.e., two parents and one adolescent). Using a week-long daily diary and physiological measures (cortisol and IL-6 assays), we assess perceived stress, mental health, and loneliness. Findings suggest that both FtF and CMC maintenance are associated with lower stress and better well-being, with FtF showing somewhat stronger associations on certain outcomes such as loneliness. Additionally, perceived gaps between desired and received maintenance predicted higher and more erratic stress and diminished mental health, underscoring the importance of meeting relational needs. These results highlight how families balance FtF and digital maintenance in everyday life and extend the TRRL by incorporating mixed-media contexts and perceived maintenance gaps.

Keywords

theory of resilience and relational load computer-mediated communication family communication relationship maintenance

Get full access to this article

View all access options for this article.

References

Abel

Machin

Brownlow

(2021). Social media, rituals, and long-distance family relationship maintenance: A mixed-methods systematic review. New Media & Society, 23(3), 632–654. https://doi.org/10.1177/1461444820958717

Adam

E. K.

Quinn

M. E.

Tavemier

McQuillan

M. T.

Dahlke

K. A.

Gilbert

K. E.

(2017). Diurnal cortisol slopes and mental and physical health outcomes: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Psychneuroendocrinology, 83, 25–41. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psyneuen.2017.05.018

Afifi

T. D.

Harrison

Zamanzadeh

Callejas

M. A.

(2020). Testing the theory of resilience and relational load in dual-earning families: Relationship maintenance as stress management. Journal of Applicated Communication Research, 48(1), 5–25. https://doi.org/10.1080/00909882.2019.1706097

Afifi

T. D.

Haughton

Parrish

(2021). Relational load: Implications for executive functioning, mental health, and feelings of unity in romantic relationships. Communication Monographs, 88(4), 506–529. https://doi.org/10.1080/03637751.2021.1896015

Afifi

T. D.

Merrill

A. F.

Davis

(2016). The theory of resilience and relational load. Personal Relationships, 23(4), 663–683. https://doi.org/10.1111/pere.12159

Afifi

T. D.

Merolla

A. J.

Afifi

W. A.

Gonzales

Salehuddin

Salmon

Wilson

(2024). Individuals’ perceptions of reciprocal relationship maintenance in their marriage and its impact on communal orientation, relational load, and ability to flourish. Human Communication Research, 50, 324–337. https://doi.org/10.1093/hcr/hqad056

Bauer

Estep

Yee

(2021, July 22). Time waiting for no mom in 2020. The Hamilton Project. https://www.hamiltonproject.org/blog/mothers_time_use_update#fni

Baym

N. K.

(2015). Personal connections in the digital age. John Wiley & Sons.

Baxter

L. A.

(2011). Voicing relationships: A dialogic perspective. Sage.

10.

Bean

R. C.

Ledermann

Higginbotham

B. J.

Galliher

R. V.

(2019). Associations between relationship maintenance behaviors and marital stability in remarriages. Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, 61(1), 82–82. https://doi.org/10.1080/10502556.2019.1619385

11.

Berger

Kraeuter

A. K.

Romanik

Malouf

Amminger

G. P.

Sarnyai

(2016). Cortisol awakening response in patients with psychosis: Systematic review and meta-analysis. Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 68, 157–166. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neubiorev.2016.05.027

12.

Biocca

Harms

Burgoon

J. K.

(2003). Toward a more robust theory and measure of social presence: Review and suggested criteria. Presence: Teleoperators and Virtual Environments, 12(5), 456–480. https://doi.org/10.1162/105474603322761270

13.

Boneva

Kraut

Frohlich

(2001). Using e-mail for personal relationships: The difference gender makes. American Behavioral Scientist, 45(3), 530–549. https://doi.org/10.1177/00027640121957204

14.

Brenan

(2020, March 5). Working moms get little reprieve from household demands. Gallup. https://bit.ly/3KwroAD

15.

Burke

T. J.

Ruppel

E. K.

Dinsmore

D. R.

(2016). Moving away and reaching out: Young adults’ relational maintenance and psychosocial well-being during the transition to college. Journal of Family Communication, 16(2), 180–187. https://doi.org/10.1080/15267431.2016.1146724

16.

Canary

D. J.

Stafford

(1992). Relational maintenance strategies and equity in marriage. Communication Monographs, 59(3), 243–267. https://doi.org/10.1080/03637759209376268

17.

Canary

D. J.

Stafford

Hause

K. S.

Wallace

L. A.

(1993). An inductive analysis of relationship maintenance strategies: Comparisons among lovers, relatives, friends, and others. Communication Research Reports, 10(1), 5–14. https://doi.org/10.1080/08824099309359913

18.

Carlson

D. L.

Miller

A. J.

Rudd

(2020). Division of housework, communication, and couples’ relationship satisfaction. Socius: Sociological Research for a Dynamic World, 6, 1–17. https://doi.org/10.1177/2378023120924805

19.

Caughlin

J. P.

Sharabi

L. L.

(2013). A communicative interdependence perspective of close relationships: The connections between mediated and unmediated interactions matter. Journal of Communication, 63(5), 873–893. https://doi.org/10.1111/jcom.12046

20.

Caughlin

J. P.

Wang

(2020). Relationship maintenance in the age of technology. In Ogolsky

B. G.

Monk

J. K.

(Eds.), Relationship maintenance: Theory, process, and context (pp. 304–322). Cambridge University Press.

21.

Churchill

E. E.

Bly

(1999). Virtual environments at work: Ongoing use of MUDs in the workplace. ACM SIGSOFT Software Engineering Notes, 24(2), 99–108. https://bit.ly/3Kwu9C5

22.

Code

(2011). Kids pick up on everything: How parental stress is toxic to kids. CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform.

23.

Cohen

(1992). A power primer. Psychological Bulletin, 112(1), 155–159. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.112.1.155

24.

Davies

P. T.

Cummings

E. M.

(1994). Marital conflict and child adjustment: an emotional security hypothesis. Psychological Bulletin, 116(3), 387–411. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.116.3.387

25.

Davis

S. M.

High

A. C.

(2017). Widening the gap: Support gaps in same race versus different race female friendship dyads. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 36(1), 187–213. https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407517722245

26.

Dindia

Canary

D. J.

(1993). Definitions and theoretical perspectives on relational maintenance. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 10(2), 163–173. https://doi.org/10.1177/026540759301000201

27.

Driver

J. L.

Gottman

J. M.

(2004). Daily marital interactions and positive affect during marital conflict among newlywed couples. Family Process, 43(3), 301–314. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1545-5300.2004.00024.x

28.

Dunatchik

Gerson

Glass

Jacobs

J. A.

Stritzel

(2021). Gender, parenting, and the rise of remote work during the pandemic: Implications for domestic inequality in the United States. Gender & Society, 35(2), 194–205. https://doi.org/10.1177/08912432211001301

29.

Edwards

A. L.

(2024). Maintaining long-distance mother–daughter relationships during college via technologically mediated self-disclosure and co-rumination [Doctoral dissertation, University of California, Santa Barbara]. eScholarship. https://escholarship.org/uc/item/2bx7j41v

30.

Fallahchai

Fallahi

Randall

A. K.

(2019). A dyadic approach to understanding associations between job stress, marital quality, and dyadic coping for dual-earning couples in Iran. Frontiers in Psychology, 10, 487. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2019.00487

31.

Feeney

B. C.

Lemay

E. P.

(2012). Surviving relationship threats: The role of emotional capital. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 38(8), 1004–1017. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167212442971

32.

Feeney

J. A.

(2006). Parental attachment and conflict behavior: Implications for offspring’s attachment, loneliness, and relationship satisfaction. Personal Relationships, 13(1), 19–36. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-6811.2006.00102.x

33.

Floyd

(2014). Relational and health correlates of affection deprivation. Western Journal of Communication, 78(4), 383–403. https://doi.org/10.1080/10570314.2014.927071

34.

Frisco

M. L.

Williams

(2003). Perceived housework equity, marital happiness, and advice in dual-earner households. Journal of Family Issues, 24(1), 51–73. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X02238520

35.

Garbe

Ogurlu

Logan

Cook

(2020). COVID-19 and remote learning: Experiences of parents with children during the pandemic. American Journal of Qualitative Research, 4(3), 45–65. https://doi.org/10.29333/ajqr/8471

36.

Goldsmith

D. J.

Domann-Scholz

(2013). The meanings of “open communication” among couples coping with a cardiac event. Journal of Communication, 63(2), 266–286. https://doi.org/10.111/jcom.12021

37.

Graham

J. E.

Christian

L. M.

Kiecolt-Glaser

J. K.

(2006). Stress, age, and immune function: Toward a lifespan approach. Journal of Behavioral Medicine, 29(4), 389–400. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10865-006-9057-4

38.

Gunn

D. O.

Gunn

C. W

(2000, September). The quality of electronically maintained relationships [Conference presentation]. Association of Internet Researchers 2019 Convention.

39.

Haas

S. M.

(2002). Social support as relationship maintenance in gay male couples coping with HIV or AIDS. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 19(1), 87–111. https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407502191005

40.

Hall

J. A.

(2020). Relating through technology. Cambridge University Press.

41.

Hayghe

(1981). Husbands and wives as earners: An analysis of family data. Monthly Labor Review. https://www.bls.gov/opub/mlr/1981/02/art5full.pdf

42.

Hertlein

K. M.

(2012). Digital dwelling: Technology in couple and family relationships. Family Relations, 61(3), 374–387. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1741-3729.2012.00702.x

43.

Hesse

Floyd

Rains

Mikkelson

Pauley

Woo

Custer

Duncan

(2020). Affectionate communication and health: A meta-analysis. Communication Monographs, 88(2), 194–218. https://doi.org/10.1080/03637751.2020.1805480

44.

High

A. C.

Crowley

J. L.

(2016). Gaps among desired, sought, and received support: Deficits and surpluses in support when coping with taboo marital stressors. Communication Research, 45(3), 319–338. https://doi.org/10.1177/0093650215626975

45.

Hilpert

Milek

Atkins

D. C.

Bodenmann

Bradbury

T. N.

(2018). Couples coping with stress: Between-person differences and within-person processes. Journal of Family Psychology, 32(3), 366–374. https://doi.org/10.1037/fam0000380

46.

Holmstrom

A. J.

Shebib

S. J.

Boumis

J. K.

Allard

Mason

A. J.

Lim

J. I.

(2021). Support gaps during the COVID-19 pandemic: Sex differences and effects on well-being. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 38(10), 2985–3009. https://doi.org/10.1177/02654075211041539

47.

Hughes

M. E.

Waite

L. J.

Hawkley

Cacioppo

(2004). A short scale for measuring loneliness in large surveys: Results from two population-based studies. Research on Aging, 26(6), 655–672. https://doi.org/10.1177/0164027504268574

48.

Jaremka

Lindgren

Kiecolt-Glaser

(2013). Synergistic relationships among stress, depression, and troubled relationships: Insights from psychoimmunology. Depression and Anxiety, 30(4), 288e296. https://doi.org/10.1002/da.22078

49.

Kashy

D. A.

Donnellan

M. B.

(2012). Conceptual and methodological issues in the analysis of data from dyads and groups. In Deaux

Snyder

(Eds.), The Oxford handbook of personality and social psychology (pp. 209–238). Oxford University Press.

50.

Keestra-Gounder

A. M.

Byndloss

M. X.

Seyffert

Young

B. M.

Chávez-Arroyo

Tsai

A. Y.

Cevallos

S. A.

Winter

M. G.

Pham

O. H.

Tiffany

C. R.

de Jong

M. F.

Kerrinnes

Ravindran

Luciw

P. A.

McSorley

S. J.

Bäumler

A. J.

De Jong

M. F.

(2016). NOD1 and NOD2 signaling links ER stress with inflammation. Nature, 532, 394–397. https://doi.org/10.1038/nature17631

51.

Kennedy

T. L. M.

Smith

Wells

A. T.

Wellman

(2008). Networked families. Pew Internet and American Life Project. https://pewrsr.ch/3xdCEhL

52.

Kocher

(2021, September 6). Study: The modern American family is more connected than ever. SWNS Digital. https://bit.ly/3uo2MVb

53.

Korzhina

Hemberg

Nyman-Kurkiala

Fagerström

(2022). Causes of involuntary loneliness among adolescents and young adults: An integrative review. International Journal of Adolescence and Youth, 27(1), 493–514. https://doi.org/10.1080/02673843.2022.2150088

54.

Malinen

Kinnunen

Tolvanen

Rönka

Wierda-Boer

Gerris

(2010). Happy spouses, happy parents? Family relationships among Finnish and Dutch dual earners. Journal of Marriage and Family, 72(2), 293–306. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1741-3737.2010.00700.x

55.

Matsunaga

(2011). Underlying circuits of social support for bullied victims: An appraisal-based perspective on supportive communication and postbullying adjustment. Human Communication Research, 37(2), 174–206. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1468-2958.2010.01398.x

56.

Mazur

A. P.

Afifi

T. D.

Afifi

W. A.

Haughton

(2023). The importance of financial hardship and the preventative role of relational maintenance in marriage at the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic. Communication Monographs, 90(4), 522–544. DOI:10.1080/03637751.2023.2235004.

57.

McEwan

(2021). Modality switching to modality weaving: Updating theoretical perspectives for expanding media affordances. Annals of the International Communication Association, 45(1), 1–19. https://doi.org/10.1080/23808985.2021.1880958

58.

McEwan

Horn

(2016). ILY & can u pick up some milk: Effects of relational maintenance via text messaging on relational satisfaction and closeness in dating partners. Southern Communication Journal, 81(3), 168–183. https://doi.org/10.1080/1041794X.2016.1165728

59.

McEwen

B. S.

(1998). Stress, adaptation, and disease. Allostasis and allostatic load. Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences, 840(1), 33–34. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1749-6632.1998.tb09546.x

60.

Neault

R. A.

Pickerell

D. A.

(2005). Dual-earning couples: The juggling act. Canadian Journal of Counseling, 39(3), 187–198. https://bit.ly/3rfhrA0

61.

Offer

Schneider

(2011). Revesting the gender gap in time-use patterns: Multitasking and well-being among mothers and fathers in dual-earner families. American Sociological Review, 76(6), 809–833. https://doi.org/10.1177/0003122411425170

62.

Ogolsky

B. G.

Stafford

(2023). A systematic review of relationship maintenance: Reflecting back and looking to the future. Personal Relationships, 30(1), 19–43. https://doi.org/10.1111/pere.12429

63.

Pew Research Center. (2021, April 7). Internet/broadband fact sheet. https://pewrsr.ch/3xhj3Nu

64.

Raley

S. B.

Mattingly

M. J.

Bianchi

S. M.

(2006). How dual are dual-income couples? Documenting change from 1970 to 2001. Journal of Marriage and Family, 68(1), 11–28. https://www.jstor.org/stable/3600353

65.

Randall

A. K.

Bodenmann

(2009). The role of stress on close relationships and marital satisfaction. Clinical Psychology Review, 29(2), 105–115. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2008.10.004

66.

Reis

H. T.

Sheldon

K. M.

Gable

S. L.

Roscoe

Ryan

R. M.

(2000). Daily well-being: The role of autonomy, competence, and relatedness. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 26(4), 419–435. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167200266002

67.

Rohleder

Aringer

Boentert

(2012). Role of interleukin-6 in stress, sleep, and fatigue. Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences, 1261(1), 88–96. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1749-6632.2012.06634.x

68.

Rudi

Dworkin

Walker

Doty

(2014). Parents’ use of information and communication technologies for family communication: Differences by age of children. Information, Communication & Society, 18(1), 78–93. https://doi.org/10.1080/1369118X.2014.934390

69.

Sahni

Kaushal

L. A.

Gupta

(2025). Gendered differences and strategies for work-life balance: Systematic review based on social ecological framework perspective. Acta Psychologica, 256, Article 105019. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.actpsy.2025.105019.

70.

Saxbe

Repetti

R. L.

(2010). For better or worse? Coregulation of couples’ cortisol levels and mood states. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 98(1), 92e103. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0016959

71.

Schwarz

(1999). Self-reports: How the questions shape the answers. American Psychologist, 54(2), 93–105. https://doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.54.2.93

72.

Short

Williams

Christie

(1976). The social psychology of telecommunications. John Wiley & Sons.

73.

Stafford

(2011). Measuring relationship maintenance behaviors: Critique and development of the revised relationship maintenance behavior scale. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 28(2), 278–303. https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407510378125

74.

Stafford

(2016). Marital sanctity, relationship maintenance, and marital quality. Journal of Family Issues, 37(1), 119–131. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X13515884

75.

Stokes

J. E.

(2017). Do “his” and “her” marriages influence one another? Contagion in personal assessments of marital quality among older spouses over a four-year span. Social Psychology Quarterly, 80(2), 204–215. https://doi.org/10.1177/0190272517701701

76.

Tan

Ruppanner

Hewitt

Maume

(2022). Restless sleep and emotional wellbeing among European full-time dual-earner couples: Gendered impacts of children and workplace demands. Contemporary Social Science, 17(4), 396–411. https://doi.org/10.1080/21582041.2022.2033305

77.

Taylor

S. E.

Klein

L. C.

Lewis

B. P.

Gruenewald

T. L.

Gurung

R. A. R.

Updegraff

J. A.

(2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: Tend-and-befriend, not fight-or-flight. Psychological Review, 107(3), 411–429. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-295X.107.3.411

78.

Tong

S. T.

Walther

J. B.

(2011). Relational maintenance and computer-mediated communication. In Wright

K. B.

Webb

L. M.

(Eds.), Computer-mediated communication in personal relationships (pp. 98–118). Peter Lang Publishing.

79.

U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. (2024, April 24). Employment characteristics of families summary. https://www.bls.gov/news.release/famee.nr0.htm#:~:text=Among%20families%20with%20an%20unemployed%20member%2C%20those%20maintained%20by%20women,Hispanic%20(87.2%20percent)%20families

80.

U.S. Census Bureau. (2021). America’s families and living arrangements: 2021 (Adult table series). https://www.census.gov/data/tables/2021/demo/families/cps-2021.html

81.

Vicari

Zoch

Bächmann

A.-C.

(2022). Childcare, work or worries? What explains the decline in parents’ well-being at the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic in Germany? Journal of Family Research, 29(1), 72–89. https://doi.org/10.20377/jfr-70

82.

Walther

J. B.

(1992). Interpersonal effects in computer-mediated interaction: A relational perspective: a relational perspective. Communication Research, 19(1), 52–90. https://doi.org/10.1177/009365092019001003

83.

Walther

J. B.

(1996). Computer-mediated communication: Impersonal, interpersonal, and hyperpersonal interaction. Communication Research, 23(1), 3–43. https://doi.org/10.1177/009365096023001001

84.

Walther

J. B.

(2011). Theories of computer-mediated communication and interpersonal relations. In Knapp

M. L.

Daly

J. A.

(Eds.), The SAGE handbook of interpersonal communication (4th ed., pp. 443–479). Sage.

85.

Wang

(2019). Support gaps in parent-emerging adult dyads: The role of support quality. Personal Relationships, 26(2), 232–261. https://doi.org/10.1111/pere.12276

86.

Wang

Roache

D. J.

Pusateri

K. B.

(2018). Associations between parents’ and young adults’ face-to-face and technology communication competence: The role of family communication patterns. Communication Research, 46(8), 1171–1196. https://doi.org/10.177/0093650217750972

87.

Burleson

B. R.

(2001). Effects of sex, culture, and support type on perceptions of spousal social support: An assessment of the “support gap” hypothesis in early marriage. Human Communication Research, 27(4), 535–566. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1468-2958.2001.tb00792.x

Supplementary Material

Please find the following supplemental material available below.

For Open Access articles published under a Creative Commons License, all supplemental material carries the same license as the article it is associated with.

For non-Open Access articles published, all supplemental material carries a non-exclusive license, and permission requests for re-use of supplemental material or any part of supplemental material shall be sent directly to the copyright owner as specified in the copyright notice associated with the article.

0.00 MB

0.03 MB