When Men Grieve: Widowers’ Stories of Coping With Their Wives’ Deaths

Abstract

To increase our understanding of the role gender plays in spousal loss, this qualitative study analyzes bereavement narratives of 33 recent widowers, aged 45–89 years, all of whom accessed the National Widowers’ Organization website. In particular, we look at how these widowers’ lives changed, the impact of changing gender norms, and coping strategies. To illuminate the temporal process evident in these narratives, we utilize Silverman’s nonlinear characteristics of bereavement and the anthropological concept of liminality. In contrast to studies of widowers in earlier decades, our analysis reveals questioning and rejection of stereotypical masculine gender norms, a wide variety of creative responses to spousal loss, and the need for individualized support.