Making Room for it all: Inclusive Experiencing in Psychotherapy

Abstract

A paradox occurs in psychotherapy. People come to rid themselves of uncomfortable feelings, unwelcome thoughts, and disturbing behaviors. They want to replace painful experiences with pleasant, fulfilling ones. However, as therapy progresses, the more clients try to rid themselves of unwelcome experiences, the more they end up stuck with them. Conversely, the more they can allow themselves to experience what they resist, allowing acceptance, expression, and forgiveness to occur, the more change becomes possible. Whatever allows this process of inclusion, or making room for all aspects of experience, facilitates successful psychotherapy. This article articulates the importance of inclusion of full experiencing as an essential aspect of successful psychotherapeutic process. It further argues that the psychotherapeutic relationship creates an interactional space in which all of a client’s experience can be included. It draws on the work of experiential psychologist Eugene T. Gendlin, psychoanalytic theory, case histories, and a play.