Rules of Everyday Family Life: The Development of Social Rules in Mother-Child and Sibling Relationships

Abstract

The aims of this study were: (1) to characterise changes in the frequency and kind of social rules used in mother-child and sibling relationships over a 14-month period; (2) to assess the degree to which conflict functioned as a forum for social rules; and (3) to describe the nature of the association between references to social rules and the quality of family relationships. Naturalistic home observations of 47 families were conducted when focal younger siblings were 33 and 47 months of age. Family conversations were coded for a variety of rules. Over time, mothers referred to rules less frequently per hour, whereas elder siblings referred to rules more frequently per hour. Proportionately, mothers employed rules relatively more often than children; however, conventional rules were utilised by mothers more than moral rules. As hypothesised, moral rules were more symmetrical in sibling relationships and more complementary in mother-child dyads. Mothers mentioned social rules more often during conflicts, whereas siblings did not. Finally, moral rules mentioned by both younger and elder siblings were associated with less harmonious sibling relationships. Results were discussed with regard to theories of moral socialisation and the nature of family relationships.